The Importance of Compassion: Why Singling Out Students is a Practice to Avoid.

As an educator, it’s essential to create an environment where students feel safe, respected, and valued. Singling out a student in front of their peers is a teaching practice that should be avoided. Having always approached my students with empathy and non-judgement, I understood the emotional impact such actions could have. When addressing a student’s performance or behavior, I always ensured these discussions took place privately, away from the eyes of their classmates.

Unfortunately, singling out students still occurs in some classrooms today. Teachers may call out students for minor issues, like incomplete homework, or attempt to correct misbehavior publicly. However, this old-fashioned approach can have significant negative effects on a student’s emotional well-being and confidence.

My perspective on this issue was profoundly reinforced during a recent personal experience. At a backyard birthday party, an incident occurred that made me acutely aware of the emotional turmoil a student might feel when singled out. I’ll share the story with altered names for privacy.

We were attending a party our children were invited to, and we arrived a bit later than planned. Prior to arriving, I took some allergy medication that made me drowsy, as the non-drowsy alternative affected my heart arrhythmia. When we got to the party, our mutual friend Richard was performing with his guitar, and guests were handed maracas to join in.

I started singing along in Spanish when, suddenly, Richard stopped playing, pointed at me, and said, “Hey, Bill, why are you holding the maraca like a candle? You are not in tune with the guitar.” The music stopped, and all eyes were on me. I felt like I had committed a grave error and was embarrassed. Questions swirled in my mind: Had I ruined the song for the birthday girl? Was I supposed to be an expert maraca player?

This feeling of being singled out was overwhelming. To make matters worse, another guest, “Alfred the bully,” approached me, asking harshly, “What is wrong with you? Is something wrong with you?” Despite my attempts to explain my allergies, he continued to berate me. I left the party feeling ashamed and like a “birthday party pooper.”

This experience gave me a vivid understanding of how students might feel when singled out in class. When I was singled out, I felt I had done something wrong. This mirrors what a student might feel—confused, embarrassed, and isolated. While adults might be able to rationalize such situations, children and teenagers often lack the tools to process these emotions healthily.

Instead of singling out a student, a more compassionate approach is to have a private conversation during recess, lunch, or after class. This way, students understand that you care about their well-being and want to help them succeed. Most teachers single out students with the intention of encouraging growth or correcting behavior, but the ramifications of public shaming can be far-reaching.

Publicly singling out a student can lead to feelings of discomfort, exclusion, and even bullying. It highlights their weaknesses in front of their peers, making them feel unwelcome and unsafe. A supportive classroom environment is crucial for fostering learning and growth. If you need to address a student’s behavior or performance, do so privately and with kindness.

Reflecting on my experience at the party, I can see the parallels with the classroom. Being singled out made me feel targeted and alone, emotions that can be even more intense for a young student. Moving forward, if I witness a teacher singling out a student, I will share my story to emphasize the importance of compassionate teaching practices.

By prioritizing empathy and understanding, we can create classrooms where students thrive emotionally and academically. Let’s leave behind the archaic practice of singling out students and embrace a more compassionate approach to teaching.

Author,

Madeleine Bodry

Tutors For Less